WOE AND 2. SOUP CAN FALL AGAIN

Coach Bell and Peyton Manning Share a Hug

Mount Baker, WA-  The Head Coach of the Mount Baker Soup Can, Chris Bell, caused a stir this off-season when he proclaimed this years Soup Can "the most talented team in Mount Baker History".  The offense, with stars Peyton Manning and Maurice Jones-Drew, is cohesive and talented.  The defense is young, fast, and aggressive.  

Yet, the Soup Can is in trouble.  It is a team that has lost both games this season...a season where Mount Baker's Soup Bowl will host the championship Fun Bowl.  Bell was confident his team would be the first to play in their own stadium for the championship game.  Season 1 host, Holicky Stadium no longer exists (torn down when the team was sold to new owners and ripped from Capitol Hill-Seattle to go play in Colorado).  Season 2 saw the Counselor Dome host the Felons and Soup Can.

"Of course we want to play for the title in our stadium," Coach Bell said, "But jeez.  The Freemasons and Royale w/Cheese are both playoff teams.  We lost to good opponents.  When we play the easy teams on our schedule, The Pretty Boys (Week 12) and the K-911s (Week 10), I guarantee victory.  We have never lost to either of those schmucks."

In the battle with the Royale w/Cheese, the game came down to RBs and WRs.  The Cheese, who won the game by a comfortable 62 points, outscored the Soup Can in these spots 77-28.  Those 49 points were not the whole difference in the game, but they were troublesome to Bell.

"Shotgun Draw," Bell said when referring to his playcalling, "All we ran that was successful was Shotgun Draw.  We are lucky Peyton Manning is one of the fastest, shiftiest players in the league...'else we really would not have had such a close game on our hands."

This was just another in a long line of nonsensical quotes from the clearly distraught coach.  When asked what he meant by "close game" Bell had already fallen asleep...from what team officials call stress-induced narcolepsy.

Coach Bell hopes to wake up the Soup Can (0-2) when he travels to Colorado to play Riggins (1-1).  The Cheese (1-1) hope to continue the roll they are on as they host the defending Champion Rainier Valley Felons (2-0).